The Mango Strut Parade’s unofficial “ROYAL” results

By Jonathan Welsh for iCoconutGrove
The 2013 King Mango Strut parade in Coconut Grove definitely put the NUT in CocoNUT Grove.

This particular tongue-in-cheek parade is designed to be a social commentary on the year’s biggest news stories starring locals. The event entails and afternoon spent surrounded by friends and sharing laughs watching a parade go by in a city that too often takes itself too seriously.

The parade was started in 1982 as a parody of the annual King Orange Jamboree Parade for the Orange Bowl. After a group of Grove residents, known as the “Mango Marching Band” were denied entry into the Orange Bowl parade due to “unsuitable instruments” such as kazoos and conch shells, they decided to create their own parade. This year, despite the rain, no one was spared…. from Duck Dynasty to Rob Ford to Monsanto.

For the third year in a row, the unofficial ROYAL judges evaluated the parade from the comfort of their umbrellas and Candelabras.  As Britain’s Princess Kate and Prince William graced the world with a ROYAL baby in 2013, the judges were dressed to embody Britain’s Royal Family. In fact, they even had a member of Britain’s Secret Intelligence Service to protect her majesty’s new grandson.

After a grueling deliberation process, the ROYAL judges have narrowed down their winners. The parade contestants were judged by their creativity, relevance, audience response and, of course…  their BRITISHness.

The parade’s winners are:

1. Most British = The parody of the “BEATLES”

2. Most Photographed = The Narcissistic Selfie parody

3. Most GREEN = The GMO parody

4. Most Bearded = the Duck Dynasty Parody

5. Most Booed = The Florida Governor Rick Scott Parody

6. Most liquored up = Parody of Toronto Mayor Rob Ford

The Mango Strut’s unofficial Royal judges will be flying back to London after celebrating in Miami for New Year’s Eve. They are looking forward, with delicious, anticipation to judge again in 2014. Britannia may rule the waves. However, Coconut Grove’s Mango Strut Parade continues to rule the streets.

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